It was December of 2019 and Trans-Siberian Orchestra was playing in Memphis, Tennessee. Which just happens to be where my Trans-Siberian Orchestra loving grandson resides (well, Shelby County, at least). And his parents, who aren’t exactly fans, suggested that perhaps I (one who does happen to enjoy their music) might consider taking said grandson to said concert.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with this group, think classical music with a heavy metal twist. And lasers. Lots and lots of lasers. My daughter had introduced me to them years before, so given the occasion . . . and the fact that I wasn’t crazy about driving home alone late at night . . . I included her in the invitation. Wilson was beyond excited, Kathryne was looking forward to the evening, and I hate crowds and noise. You may draw your own conclusions.

The concert was being held at the FedEx Forum, so we all ate downtown then walked to the arena. As we were saying goodbye to my son and the rest of his family, I suddenly realized I had a problem. In my purse was a box cutter and a small hammer that would convert to a screwdriver. I couldn’t be certain, but I had a feeling security might not be happy when they searched my belongings. So I removed the offending items, handed them to my son for safekeeping (his eyes got really big when I did), and off we went.

Now I should probably explain that my purse/suitcase is the closest thing to the carpet bag carried by Mary Poppins as you can get in the real world. Granted, I’ve never pulled a floor lamp or a hat stand out of it, but if you need a flashlight, I’ve got you covered. Or an iPhone charging cable or air freshener (just in case you have a room that, ah . . . might need . . . freshening . . .), or Advil or Tylenol (I carry both), or maybe a band aid (hope you like Ninja Turtles, or Jake and the Neverland Pirates, or maybe Winnie the Pooh, if it’s a good day. I think I’ve got some Star Wars, too). There are nail clippers and a fingernail file, a small bag with toothpaste and a toothbrush, and a full set of eating utensils, compliments of my daughter who knew I carried a spoon (do you know how many restaurants only provide a knife and fork? And how many times the grandkids needed a spoon?) and thought I could use an entire set. She was right. They’re the kind you would take camping, complete with their own little rubbery holder thingy. There’s a pouch full of pens, highlighters, and pencils, and another that holds the box cutter, a cloth tape measure, After Bite (have I ever mentioned how much mosquitos love me?), a large black marker, and mascara (that I don’t use anymore . . . I got tired of wiping little flecks of it from under my eyes). Oh, and I do actually carry my billfold and checkbook in there, too. And nose spray.

In other words, I’m prepared for all kinds of requests/emergencies. And my purse weighs a ton.

But believe it or not, there are items for which I have been asked that do not reside in my magical purse. I honestly can’t think of any right now, but I know it’s happened in the past and we’ve simply had to make do with something else. Because there’s no way to prepare for everything Life will throw at you. 

That’s a hard lesson to learn, especially if you’re a person who believes in preparation. But there’s one thing in which you can rest assured. You are not the only one who has ever been afflicted in whatever manner you’re being afflicted. You are not the first and you will not be the last, and as cold as that may sound, it’s actually an amazing comfort. Because it means you’re not alone.

Whether it’s losing a spouse or a child or a parent, whether it’s going through a divorce or a house fire or a natural disaster—whatever the challenge may be—someone has already walked the path before you. No matter the obstacles you may encounter, someone has already met them head on and overcome. No matter how defeated and lost you may feel, someone has been equally beaten, and they have emerged victorious. And many of those people are ready and more than willing to help you do the same. You just have to find them and then be willing to learn and grow from their experiences. 

No one can prepare for everything . . . no matter how much stuff they carry in their metaphorical purse. So when Life hands you a heart-breaking, earth-shattering surprise, and you find yourself struggling just to breathe, remember—you can draw strength from the people around you . . . and the knowledge that you are not alone.

About the author: Lisa Shackelford Thomas is a fourth generation member of a family that’s been in funeral service since 1926. She has been employed at Shackelford Funeral Directors in Savannah, Tennessee for over 40 years and currently serves as the manager there. Any opinions expressed here are hers and hers alone, and may or may not reflect the opinions of other Shackelford family members or staff.